Monday

"I don’t need to carry everything at once."

Welcome to Monday! Today, we're chatting about:

• Friendships through life changes

• Feeling comfortable leaving your kids at home

• How to find reliable childcare

• Tips for enjoying a kid-free night

• The company reimagined collagen supplements

How Friendships Shift After Becoming Parents

Friendships can feel very different once kids enter the picture. The spontaneous dinners, constant texting, and easy weekends together often get replaced with packed schedules, delayed replies, and trying to coordinate calendars weeks in advance. It doesn’t necessarily mean anything is wrong. Life just starts requiring more from everyone at once.

One of the biggest shifts is learning to loosen expectations. A slower response time or canceled plan is often less about the friendship itself and more about exhaustion, work, parenting, or simply trying to keep up with daily life. Approaching friendships with curiosity instead of assumptions can make these seasons feel a lot less personal and a lot more compassionate.

The friendships that tend to last are often the ones built with flexibility. Quick phone calls during errands, voice notes while cooking dinner, or picking up where you left off months later can still hold real closeness. Adult friendship sometimes looks less like constant contact and more like quietly trusting the relationship can stretch through busy seasons and still be there when you return.

How to Feel More Comfortable Leaving Your Kids

Finding someone to watch your kids can feel surprisingly emotional. Even if it’s just for a few hours, handing over care to someone else takes trust, communication, and usually a little bit of nerves.

One of the simplest ways to feel more confident is slowing the process down. Parents are increasingly doing trial runs before leaving kids alone with a sitter, checking references directly instead of relying only on apps, and having more open conversations about household rules, screen time, routines, and boundaries upfront.

Experts also recommend paying attention to how children respond after spending time with a new sitter. Older kids may openly share how they felt, while younger children often communicate through behavior and mood changes instead. Sometimes the smallest details, like whether a child seemed relaxed, heard, and comfortable, can tell you a lot.

At the same time, many families are realizing that clear communication is part of safety. Talking openly about expectations, consent, routines, and emergency plans can help everyone feel more prepared and on the same page before parents ever walk out the door.

Can You Trust Your Babysitter?

As parents, it’s natural to worry about leaving your child with a sitter. How do you know your sitter is providing the level of care your child needs? Many parents report canceling plans or skipping vacations due to unreliable child care.

With Care.com, you can search for the best sitter for your child. Before making a choice, you can view a sitter’s profile, read reviews, and chat or schedule a video interview directly. Depending on your needs, you can search for sitters that lead enriching activities for your children, prepare nutritious meals, or do light housework like folding laundry!

We’re thrilled to have Care.com as a new sponsor for the Note to Self, and we’re excited for our community to support them. We’ve partnered with them to offer readers a 25% discount using code RV25.

Take a look at some of the local sitter profiles here and claim 25% off with code RV25.

Thank you to Care.com for sponsoring Note To Self. 

How to Actually Enjoy a Kid-Free Night

Leaving the house without the kids can feel oddly difficult, even when it’s something fun. One minute you’re excited for dinner, a wedding, or a girls’ night, and the next you’re triple-checking snacks, pajamas, and whether the babysitter knows where the extra Band-Aids are.

Parents say one of the biggest stress reducers is prepping kids ahead of time instead of slipping out quietly. Talking through the plan, hyping up time with grandparents or a sitter, and sticking to familiar bedtime routines can make the whole evening feel smoother for everyone involved. Small details matter more than people think.

Another underrated trick? Preparing yourself before the chaos starts. Laying out your outfit early, charging your phone, packing pumping supplies if needed, and giving yourself extra travel time can prevent the rushed, frazzled feeling that tends to follow parents out the door.

And once you actually make it out, experts and parents alike agree on one thing: enjoying yourself matters too. Taking time away from parenting responsibilities, even briefly, can help people feel more present, connected, and recharged when they come back home.

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Wellness Round-Up

Parting Thoughts

• ✅ Did You Know: Strong support systems are linked to improved parental wellbeing. It takes a village.

• 🌅 Sunset Of The Day: Sunsets are more than beautiful—they’re actually good for your mood. Got a favorite one? Reply to this email with your best sunset or sunrise photo for a chance to be featured!

• 💭 Final Self-Care Thoughts for Today: You’re allowed to take up space in your own life. Your needs matter, too.

Enjoying Note to Self?

Know of a great self-care tip or article you'd love to share with the community? Want to send us pictures of you completing one of your self-care rituals? Email us at [email protected]!